Shop Talk

who here thinks Jesus is black?

just had one the other day..kid comes in complaining no one can hear him on his Lg4400 and that customer service sent him here so we could send it in for repair( we are an agent without a tech) I ask to take a look at the handset and have to bite my lip to keep from laughing, 🤣 cause the phone looks like roadkill...just like a display phone a kiosk would have to promote Phone Insurance..it looks like its been slid on cement at least 50 times, with scrapes all over ..i then open it up and see watermark is red..and so is the rest of the inside (or a light pink anyway) he says "oh thats magic marker" he then (as they always do) says "but its under warranty" 😡 I then tell him that if LG got this phone in for service and opened it up they ...
(continues)

that Cingular (At&t) IS GOING to buy US Cellular by a customer.

Of course I had no clue what I was talking about when I stated this is not going to happen and would pose no benefit to an already crappy company (cingy/at&t).

So a married couple comes in... The wife was doing all the talking... went a little something like this:

me-m
cust-c

c-"My phone is under warranty, I just got off the phone with them and they wanted me to come in and have you check my phone for water damage or physical damage..."

m-(checking out the phone) "Well the good news is that there's no water damage, but the bad news is that warranty will not cover your phone that is in TWO PIECES." 🤣

c-"oh no, thats not damaged, my husband just fliped it open to answer a call and it broke right in half. It's covered."

m- 🤨

HOW THE CRAP ARE PEOPLE ANSWERING THEIR PHONES???? FK!!! 😛

So the company I work for just started selling another service besides phones. Not many people know much abuot said service.

Sooo I like to call other stores and harass them about said service. 😁
Then they find out it's me and say RAWRRRR 🤣

Oh, and uh, ghetto kids are scary.


Do you prank call your other stores???? 😲

I just moved to a new mall.
I have ZERO idea where anything in the mall, or this city is.
I get a strange satisfaction telling people I don't where things are. Even though it's the truth. They look at me like I should know the mall like the back of my hand.

DIE I SAY!!!

😁

I had a customer on the line who was in TEARS because she ordered a battery and the box came empty (lost in shipping) and it will take a week or so to research the discrepancy... Once they do that they will overnight for free a new battery... but the only other option is to have her pay to purchase another battery (Because we don't have any way to verify that she didn't get one the first time, people lie... a lot, to make a claim on a package that didn't have the correct contents we unfortunately HAVE to do the research, it's sad I know.)

She was upset because she's loosing "Hundreds of dollars every day." because she doesn't have that battery... but she doesn't want to buy another one, she wants THAT one NOW.

My thought is, if it's t...
(continues)

I love the ?'s that you get asked when people buy phones. here is my question of the week.

Me: Hello

Cust: I have a dumb ? to ask you. (Atleast this person knew it was dumb.)

Me: Give it to me.

Cust: Do you have to own and know how to operate a computer to own a cell phone.

Me 😕 😕 😕 What, No. Even a caveman can use a phone. (Sorry Geico)

cust: oh ok I thought you would have to know how to atleast use a comp.

Me: Nope

Where do people come up with this stuff. You got to love the customers. 🙂 🙂 🙂

Let me see what you got. Hopefully its better than mine.

So many times I've called customers' cell phones and asked for the account holder, and it turns out their daughter or son or mother or sister's uncle's best friend is actually the one who uses the account. I've started to double check that I'm speaking with the account holder before I get into my pitch, just so I'm not wasting my breath.

I just called this one lady, we'll call her Jane Doe, this was our conversation.

Me: Hi, is this Jane?

JD: Jane who?

Me: Jane Doe

JD: Who is this? (She sounds kind of puzzled, so I figure I either have the wrong number, or she and her daughter share the same name and she's trying to figure out which one I want)

Me: It's Emily, I'm calling for ****, is this Jane Doe?

JD: Well, you're my c...
(continues)

so my friend (on cingular) and some of her freinds (also on cingular) have been getting calls from a withheld number where some pervert says some REALLY disgusting, horibble things to them. I currently work for vz so i am not of much use to them and was wondering if any cingular rep could help me understand what, if anything, someone could do to figure out a number that is being withheld.

also..

i did call cust care and the cingular agent line (im a seasonal cingular agent at a best buy) and got run around the loop with them so any help would be GREATLY appreciated.

thanks so much

Does anyone know about the Buzz or Blend?

I've had some new questions pop-up and I don't have answers for them!

1. Will the Hybrid phones carry a SIM card?

2. How will they be activated? Through Sprint's method using the CDMA network activation or with Nextel's SIM cards?

3. When we will see these phones on the major city markets?

Looks like raycarroll70 has something to be proud about people. This was taken from a full page ad in today's Washington Post...

Thanks to every single Sprint Nextel employee. Because of your tireless dedication to our customers, the plan is working:

> BETTER THAN EVER. The Sprint National Network has earned top
honors for the fewest dropped calls of national carriers as rated
by a third-party independent study.

> LARGEST, FASTEST MOBILE BROADBAND NETWORK. The Sprint
network is the largest, fastest mobile broadband network in the country,
including over 10,000 cities and over 1,000 airports.

> HAPPIER CUSTOMERS. The Nextel network has reached
best-ever status for call quality, has the lowest ever dropped
and blocked call...
(continues)

This is something that went down last week at my store:

(door opens and in walks Kid Rock/Joe Dirt looking guy I will refer to as JD, mullet and everything)

ME: Hello! How are you today?

JD: Yep...yeah....yeah

ME: 👀

JD:I wuz jus comin in for my eyeglass subscription.

ME: 👀 Um...OK? 👀

JD: Yeah....yeah

ME: Soooo....do need some info on a mobile phone? Because that is what we sell here. We don't do eyeglass PREscriptions.

JD: Yeah Yeah....Yeah...(steps back from counter and folds arms) so what did you think about that?

ME: (silent just looking) 👀

JD: (ansering his own question) Yeah...me too...uh-huh...ok then....God bless ya maam...uh huh....yeah...yeah

🤣 😳 :...
(continues)

Had this little gem of a chat today.

Me Hello. Thank you for visiting our chat service. How may I help you today?
Stoopid Visitor: my lg chocolate broke where should i send it to
Me: Call Customer Care at 1-800-922-0204. They will be able to help you.
SV: fine u little [British cigarette].
Me: I would appreciate it if you did not use that language. If you continue to do so, this chat will need to be terminated.
SV: wuts terminated
Me: Terminated means ended.
SV: ok im f*cking scared u little f*cker go lick balls
Me: Unfortunately, I will need to close this chat session with you.

The ironic thing is that if I was a [British cigarette], then I probably wouldn't have a problem with licking balls.

What are your favorite stupid questions customers ask.
Mine is one I hear 20+ times a day:
"Why do I have to pay a deductible? I have insurance"

Had a customer that had an analyst review to verify last name......

Me- Did your last name recently change?

Cust- Yeah it used to be ****** I severed him off.

Me- OK....(proceded with activation)

Me- So how long were you married for?

Cust- Too long. My husband decided he likes men better.

Me 🤣

Cust- I have no problem with gays, just not when I find them in bed with my husband.

Why is it that some people just think they can't be wrong??? They out right REFUSE to be wrong. They seem to think that if they just don't change their story and they insist hard enough, they will somehow be right.

I've had a pile of customers today insist that I do things I can't. Some are just flat-out denying the problems with their phones could have been caused by them, even though they have water dripping out of them or they are broken in half. Others are trying to tell me how to do business. I haven't put up a single activation today. It's been nothing but complaints. I hate these days...

Jon Fortt, the author of the online site The Utility Belt, has bounced from Verizon Wireless to Sprint. I'll let you hear right from the horse's mouth so to speak...

http://blogs.business2.com/utilitybelt/2007/03/ditch ... »

For those firewalled...

Ditching Verizon Wireless for Sprint:

The sweet data deal

"I was already itching to ditch Verizon (VZ).
My wife and I had switched from Sprint (S) two years ago, because Sprint service was spotty in the apartment where she lived before we got married. But it was time to switch back.

Two years back we got on a Verizon Wireless family plan and commenced to paying through the nose – between $155 and $170 per month, typically – for two lines with enoug...
(continues)

I work in a place where they keep trying to make good analogies to the business that we are in since a lot of customers don't seem to understand...

So I have come up with the pony analogies:

We sell ponies and upkeep of ponies. (upkeep = pony food and a posiblly a saddle)

We don't make ponies, we never have made ponies. We just sell ponies and their upkeep.

You can buy a pony online and then pay us to do their upkeep.

You can buy a donkey that looks and act like a pony, but unfortunately we don't service donkeys, just ponies.

That's great that you want us to do upkeep on your llama, but unfortunately we can only do ponies.

No, I don't really know where you can get service for your llama, but would you like to try out a p...
(continues)

Is anyone else not allowed/not supposed to do in store cancellations?

My companies policy is for us to instruct them to call the retentions department accessable via normal cst care for all line or account terminations. Mainly this is so they have one last shot at keeping them as retentions has access to all the really really good codes. The last customer I had got all lippy with me when I told him he had to contact cst care to terminate an account and it got me wondering what companies allow in store reps to cancel lines. (sometimes I know there are exceptions to this but 99% of the time this is the way it is)