Shop Talk

Me: I understand that, how long have you been with us?
Cust: 7 Years
Me: So you've never paid activation fee for the past 7 years?
Cust: Yes
Me: Well, its time for you to pay it now 😈

I would think that I am making your job easier by collecting all the necessary information needed to activate a phone providing it to you so all you have to do is push the button. I can't activate phones in this department, so it is indeed necessary for me to transfer a customer to you. I try to do this on every transfer call to make things easier.

However when I hear the response "No thank youuuu" and then a click....(don't think I was supposed to hear that)


Thanks a lot customer care. Next time you can gather the information yourself.

Me: "What can I help you with today?"

Customer: "I'm at the store and they tell me I can cancel the contract without an early termination fee."

Me: "As long as he verifies active duty then yes. Can I have his social to run the verification?"

Customer: "***-**-****"

Me:"Alright so his active duty status verification came through when would you like the cancellation to take effect?"

Customer:"Well...can I keep the same number but just cancel the contract?

Me: "No, if you cancel the contract you cancel the line, then you have 45 days to restore it in which the contract would continue where you left off."

Customer: "Oh, give me a minute." *I hold for about 3 minutes* "Ok well I'll just call back tomorrow."

I bet she'll ...
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We had to sign dumbaz boooklets that promise better cust svc, the page we sign says 'be committed' sooo...

...when I deal with someone who has 5 lines on a family plan because each times he wants a new phone for himself he just opens a new line and contract to get it at the lower pricing. Like seriously people... why would you sign another contract to pay more a month to get a cheaper phone? May as well pony up the cash for the phone without the contract, jeez...

All of my rage.


My work day just got an hour longer.

what cities do customers call from that make you laugh?

So I've done my greeting, asked you what you need help with, and then you proceed to spew forth an unending string of words explaining why you are calling, 99% of those words are unnecessary, driving up my call-handling time.... In the very moment I hear you desperately gasping for air readying yourself to hit me with more idiocy, you windbag, I take this rare opportunity to explain to you that I cannot help you and that I need to transfer you to another department.

Depending upon my rage level, I will either

a) Waste another 19 minutes of your life and mine listening to you flap your lips about things that don't even matter, and THEN transfer you, or

b) Reach for the HOLD button, bringing me pleasure as I place you on hold as I h...
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I was doing a transfer and my hand slipped and hit the cord and the iphone fell. The phone is okay. On the other hand I had to start the transfer over because it disconnected the cord.

I can't imagine what would happen if I did break it. 😳

By the way.. I was opening some packages we got in and accidentally went a little hard on the box and cut one of the phones outside display.

Oh that's perfect Mr. Customer, my first name is Manny and my last name is Jerr (Manny Jerr). So what can I do for you today? 🤣

(ME, walking into work with my big ol' sunglasses. Waves at a friend as soon as I perch at my desk, putting my things down..I've literally been in the building for 2 minutes, searching for a seat until then..)

"Hello! How are you?"

(Supervisor WHO WAS IN MY TRAINING CLASS AND HAS BEEN HERE AS LONG AS I HAVE, taps my shoulder..)

"Take those off, or i'll PIN you!"


😳 🤨 😡 👿 GTFO

you worthless supervisor, for taking a giant duke on not only everything I've just said, but the policies our company have put in place, just to make yourself look better. Congratulations, I'm nominating you for the biggest douche of the universe award.

Seriously am I the last one alive in PhoneScoop Land. Its more dead in here than in Lindsey Lohan and Charlie Sheens Nasal Cavaties put together........J/k..... but not really.... 😳

What drives me crazy?

P-eo-p-l-e.......w-h-ooo- t-a-l-kkk
l-i-k-e t-h-ii-sssss



Seriously, if you're that far gone mentally, and talk in friggin' morse code, YOU SHOULD NOT BE MAKING PHONE CALLS!!!

I cannot understand you if you sound like you're having a f***ing seizure or brain aneurysm as you're talking to me... SOMEONE ELSE NEEDS TO BE DOING THE TALKING FOR YOU!!

I had a call like this yesterday. The more I think about it, the more scared I get. I feel bad. However, I have no idea what she was talking about.

It's like this: picture yourself headbangin' to Metallica while wiggling your finger up and down the outside of your throat while singing "Crazy" by Gnarls Barkley. Yeah, it was just like that.

Dear customers,

You have no idea the amount of excitment that courses through me when I hear the word "yes" mumbled in response to my question: "Do you already have an account with us, or are you looking to open up a new one?"

"Yes" is exactly what I wanted to hear. I now know everthing that I needed to know for the rest of this call, and I even am able to read your thoughts via the phone with that one worded response as well!! THANK YOU!!!! 👿

Sometimes, though, I will admit, even though your response was extremely enlightening I really am too dense to completely read your entire thought process. And for this I apologize because I now have to ask you to clarify. No worries though, because when you heave that exasperated ...
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It has started. But I had insurance for my EVO. Sorry! Please feed $100.00 bills into the machine and your new Iphone complete with no insurance will be mailed to you in 3 weeks or so.

quit ****ing themselves in the ****ing *** and hire some more ****ing help for the ****ing night shift. They know every ****ing mon-wed ****ing night we're going to have 300 ****ing calls pouring out because our ****ing company can't get their **** together and make **** that ****ing works.

But no, because our company would rather ****ing spend money on ****ing lube so they can **** each other in the *** we can't get the proper number of workers, and instead get slammed night after night because our company treats us like ****ing dirt so people ****ing leave. Well no ****ing **** sherlock. If you ****ing treat someone like ****ing **** of course they won't want to hang around.


**** it all and I hope the ****ers who run this company ...
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I thought it would be by now

Why you set up phones?