Shop Talk

a bank is looking to do a promotion in my area...

Lady comes in, says, can I pay a bill here?

I say sure... start typing away getting ready to get her information. I look up a SECOND... like, not even a second probably. There is an envelope sitting on the counter. No customer in sight.

She apparently, want's me to put a ****ing stamp on the thing. We can't take check payments in the store, and I can't even call it in because there is NO account info anywhere on the thing.

What should I do guys. I'm half tempted to toss it in the shredder. The other half of me says leave a note for when she comes back in, explaining the situation and saying: "Please inform customer of existance of post office."

Has anyone else noticed the large amount of customers that come in just to complain about how bad at&t is, and how their service has gotten worse since we became at&t instead of cingular, and how their coverage is worse?

I literally want to scream "WE ARE THE SAME COMPANY. THE SAME CALL CENTERS, AND THE SAME NETWORK." Just because your phone now SAYS at&t does not give you the right to automatically start thinking your service is worse.


.. end rant. haha

If i have a lot to do for a customer instead of putting them on hold I'll offer them a song...

I usually sing...

phil collins (i can feel it callin' in the air at night, oh no)

or

strangers in the night by sinatra or someone

most of the words I don't know so I just make the words as i go along and put the customer's name in there...

My quality people crack up on me when I do that quality scores are usually like 90 something...

You guys do anything crazy like that?

Guy comes in, phone has a sticking key. He's not eligible for upgrade, but does have insurance. After the usual back n forth about why he's gotta call the insurance department, he says in a loud, frustrated voice "why does everything have to be so damn complicated?!?"

My response? "Sir, I can't answer that question. I'm a salesman, not a philosopher."

He stormed out, muttering curses into his beard. I chuckled.

C= Customer
M= Me

C: So where is BIg E?
M: Who?

C: Big E.. He works here
M: There is no one named big e that works here

C: you mean right now?
M: No I mean perioid

C: You Sure? he said he works here
M: Nope I just work here so I couldnt possible know who works here as well..

C: ohh its like that ok... and walks off


5 mins later...

C: you were right he works at another store.

Only 58 Minutes left of my last day working for this God-forsaken industry! I am outta here for good!
-no more putting up with the stupid @$$ customers b!tching all the time about this and that.
-No more working a 50+ hour week and getting paid s#!t
-No more getting called in on my days off. (They were few and far between anyway)
-No more having to repeat myself 100 times because someone was too stupid to understand the first 99.
-No more sitting in my kiosk counting down the minutes until close.
-No more posting stupid crap on phonescoop because I'm bored outta my mind and every other web page is firewalled.
-And No More CELL PHONES!

ATTENTION ALL NEXTEL REPS!!

Congrats! I thank you from the bottom of my heart! You have just won the privelidge of dealing with the most hateful, nuts, stupid, ignorant customer ever! She started with Sprint, but they ______ed her over. Switched to Cingular, and they had the audacity to charge her a pro-rate and activation fee's on her first bill (which she never paid), then switched to VZW, where she purchased 3 chocolates, never paid her bill, all her bills were well over $500 because they wouldn't shut up and kept going over their minutes, and since she was ALWAYS past due, we could never order her FRU replacements, or get her on a better calling plan, and because we shut her off for not keeping up with a payment arrangement, she's...
(continues)

Additional Services

Mall Directory Assistance................$01.00
Directions to a Bathroom.................$00.50
Other carrier information................$05.00
Me Punching you in the face..............$FREE
Using MY trash can.......................$00.75
Mall hours...............................$00.25
Touching my glass w/out a purchase.......$00.50
*kids finger/s (per finger)..............$01.50

Manager not on duty:

Customer service issues...................................$15. 00
Answers to Stupid questions..............$50.00
*if we don't answer I just saved you $50

Note and disclaimer:

-Unsolcited comments about carrier I am
working for will cause you to be shot
-If you plan to steal let us know
-Shoplifter...
(continues)

I just had a customer escalate because only one line is eligible for upgrade...She doesnt get it and I've explained it like 4 times now. You eligiblity for upgrade (either early upgrade or standard) is based on your contract length, payment history, adjustment history, and mainly how much your PRIMARY line acrues in charges monthly. The PRIMARY line is always eligible first because the PRIMARY line has the highest charges for monthly service. Apparently thats beyond her comprehension. Yes they all have the same contract end date so technically, she shouldnt be eligible until the 21st month of her 24 month contract... WELL SUPRISE! The line that IS eligible is only 18 months into contract so the system is actually allowing her to upgrade...
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Had this customer come in asking for help with his phone. Sure, I say, what's going on with it? He tells me that it randomly shuts itself off. I look at the water indicator, and there is no sign of water damage. I asked how often it had been happening. He told me it only happened when it was in his pocket and he was sitting on it.
😳
C: Uhh...My advice would be not to sit on it.

Idiot.

I'm the ASM in a store that used to do huge numbers (thanks to fraud all before I came to the company) but I have this DM who has been able to convince himself that it wasnt due to fraud even though he participated in the prosecution of several of the employees responsible, he still expects huge number from my two stores and I need a polite way to tell him that hes delusional. right now all I can come up with is "you must be a F*ing retard" my SM has had enough and has told me that this will be his last week with the company... I'm a student I dont have the time to dedicate to this company to be a manager... grrr... im not sure what I should do... any advice

so i had a customer come in to my work just now and say that he was on a call and his phone all the sudden stopped working so he took the battery out and put the phone and battery and everything in the freezer for 2 hours... took it out... let it thaw and put it back together and it worked.... ha what gives someone the idea to do this? seriously... who has something happen to their phone and just think hey i'll put it in the freezer?

a few weeks ago this really old fart came in the store complaining about his "celibate" service.

😁

and i'd say something like "why are you unhappy with our CELLULAR service?"

but he kept going on about celibate towers and yada yada yada. i got to giggling and he wanted to know what was so funny. i couldn't think of anything except "You keep saying CELIBATE instead of CELLULAR and it's FUNNY TO ME."

but i didn't say that. old people are funny.

Someone brought in their phone after they ran it over with a lawnmower. The worst part about it is that they expected us to fix it.

That yelling at me, carrying on, storming out the door, coming back in, yelling some more, and threatening me with a cancelled contract is going to change the fact that I have no control over what Tech's guidelines are for warranty replacing you with a different model phone instead of the one you have, is going to change the situation? Then go right ahead, do all those things, and tomorrow when you come back, I'll still give you the same answer. Go ahead lady, make my day. Cancel your 4 line newly upgraded 2 months ago contracts all over a $140 retail value phone. Go ahead, make my day! 😈


I hate mornings that start out like this 😢

Do you know where Amp'd Mobile is?

🤣


That made my day!

guy comes into the store with a nokia 6015, coat-hanger antenna, and a tale of woe...he's on PREPAID service, has been for TEN YEARS or so, and recently PORTED HIS HOME NUMBER TO A PREPAID PHONE. and he has a home business, if I lose a call, I lose $$, we've heard it before. Can we say horrid credit? so, he starts dropping calls, and is upset, tells me that he will keep us for another month, but then if we don't treat him WELL ENOUGH he'll leave for someone else. I was wiping smiles off my face the entire time. he's on the inpulse plan.

I lied to him, telling him that I would forward on up the chain his concerns. 🤣

call me a horrid salesperson, but a refill doesn't give me crap, and him b!tching about his 4 dropped calls ...
(continues)

So I had this old guy come in I was in my back room filling up some balloons.

G-Old Guy
M-Me

g- Is everyone on their lunchbreak?

m- I don't get lunchbreaks sir.

g- Oh really? Well I have some questions about the sh!t the put on my bill.

Pulls out his dish network bill. saying swear words under his breath. Which is funny because he is like 85 and has a nasty hunch back.

m- Well sir, I don't handle dish network, we sell wireless telephones. We are Cingular not dish network that is cable TV. We are just cell phones.

g- Are you sure? You have the same symbol I thought you guys were the same.

m- No we don't. Anyways I'm sure there was a 1800 number on your bill you could call if you have any questions on your dishnetwork ...
(continues)

We have lost our collective minds.

My partner in crime (i.e. Co-worker) is dancing to the hold music. I joined her, we did the macarana... to the hold music.

Then we did some arobic exercises... at our desks, in the middle of the call floor...

To the hold music.

Yeah, it's time to leave now.