Suspended AKA Vacation
so ive been a temp here
Phonetic alphabet of my cubical items
B: ball of rubber bands
C: Captain Underpants books
D: Dude Love clock
E: Empty jar of nuts
F: Frank N Furter Action Figure
G: Gong (thats a fun one)
H: Hello Kitty Pin Cushion
I: Indian headdress (inappropriate thanksgiving attire, apparently)
J: Jalapenos in a can from 2001 (seeing how long I can keep them)
K: Killing Joke Graphic Novel
L: lemonaide (no idea where it came from but its just a can of lemonaide)
M: Monthy Python and the Holy Grail Script
N: nun-chuk (its a mini catapult that throws plastic nuns)
O: Oscar the grouch stuffed animal
P: Pokemon Yellow
Q: Queen greatest hits CD
R: Recorder (the musical kind)
S: Scuba Steve (yes, From Big Daddy)
T: Tardis Nitelight
U: Unhinged &Unglued MTG...
getting Shop Talk back to its roots
Cmr: Hi, I know I dont have coverage, but i need to file a claim
me: Sir, we can not file claims for you if you have no coverage
Cmr: fine you con artist (hears cmr speaking to carrier rep in the background)
Cmr: ok i have insurance now file my claim
Me: ok.....may I ask when your phn was damaged, lost, or stolen
Cmr: yeah it was about 3 weeks ago
Me: (continues with claim as usual) ok sir it looks like your claim is not covered
Cmr: WHY NOT THIS D@MN TIME
Me: Well sir you did not have coverage at the time your device was damaged, therefore the damage is not covered by our insurance
Cmr: Youre a scam artist! Send me to someone spanish I can reason with them
Me: ok sir, right awa...
So I either don't care or just expected it for so long I wasn't bothered.
My scores were average and then they changed my QA coach, that's when they started to get really good. Then they switched me back to my old coach, and now they suck.
AD discussions continues below...
I work pt at a movie theater
Me: Sure, what size?
Customer: I do not know, what flavors do you have?
Me: Umm, larger, medium and small.
Customer: I'll take the Coke:
Me: Okay, what size would you like your Coke?
Me: What size is regular?
Customer: What sizes do you have?
Me: (I'm getting frustrated all ready, I grab the cups and put them on the counter) We have small, medium and large.
Customer: I will take the one in the middle.
Me: Cool that is the small.
Customer: I thought that was a medium
Me: This one is a small
Customer: Then why did you put it in the middle.
Me: I have no clue why, did you want a medium coke now?
WTF, how hard is it to order one drink!
Customer Service Dictionary
Discount applied to a whiny customer.
The discount percentage or number of discounts applied to a same customer is directly in proportion to the times the customer has called in to complain about the service/product.
i.e.: "Man, this is the 5th time a supervisor call on this case has resulted in a Customer B!tchcount."
Not to be confused with Customer Disscount.
Which is a minor discount applied to a customer just to get him to shut up. Usually less than 10%.
You are offered a plan that will save you over $50.00 monthly, give you more than you currently have and yet you still pull the "i get better offers from other carriers and i can cancel right now" card when you have ETF of over $1000 (Tax and service used not included) asking for more money.
Advice you feel you need to give to callers
- If you're calling a call center for help drunk or high, at least have the decency to enunciate properly, it will save you and the agent a lot of time and effort.
The walking dead
https://drive.google.com/folderview?id=0B8SGJ_yHucwD ... »
Just got a free Moto G
I chose the 16 gb out of a quick 10 min search( found nothing) and out of impulse,
Lets see how it handles...
I hate it when...
Moto X $100 Off Coupon
Episode 4 of The Adventures of Bob, the Typical Cingular Customer
*In the waiting room*
Bob: So, how are you feeling now, sweetheart?
Freckles: How do you think I feel? I've been puking my guts out.
Bob: Umm...that sounds interesting. So...um...
Freckles ignores Bob, as she always does, by downloading some new games and ringtones on her phone.
Bob: Umm...honey, do those things cost money?
Freckles: Nope. The commercial said they're free. I just send a text message to 666HAHAGOTCHABASTARD and I get free ringtones for life.
Bob: Oh. Ok, if you say so, I'll just smile assumingly. So whatever happened to that boyfriend of yours?...
It's been a while.....