Shop Talk
Fliering
ok... so... i work here i have no choice but to park my car here... im tired of getting fliers put on my car by little 16 year old kids making a 1.50 an hour to basically litter...
today i made a sign informing people that if they put fliers on my car i will trow water baloons at them...
sure enough... johnny saggypants teenager comes along about an hour later with his little bundle of fliers... reads the sign... and proceeds to place about ten fliers on my car... of course in this amount of time i went to the back... accessed my surplus of waterbaloons... grabbed three and headed out...
when JST turns around very f'n pissed sprint lead is right behind him... armed...
m - take em off
jspt - no
m - *throws "warning shot" at...
(continues)
today i made a sign informing people that if they put fliers on my car i will trow water baloons at them...
sure enough... johnny saggypants teenager comes along about an hour later with his little bundle of fliers... reads the sign... and proceeds to place about ten fliers on my car... of course in this amount of time i went to the back... accessed my surplus of waterbaloons... grabbed three and headed out...
when JST turns around very f'n pissed sprint lead is right behind him... armed...
m - take em off
jspt - no
m - *throws "warning shot" at...
(continues)
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Y'all are substandard! I'm on my knees waving my arms in the air. (We're not worthy, we're not worthy)
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hey i just got tired of having to pick litter off my car every other day... i figured waterbalooning was a safe yet effective way to get my point across... i mean hell i made a sign... he was properly warned... and deliberatly ignored it
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And now when you go outside instead of picking up fliers you will need to report the vandalism that is going to happen to your car. 😲
I hope it doesn't but where I am from it sure would
I hope it doesn't but where I am from it sure would
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as aforementioned the guy didnt want a fight... i can see my car from here thats how i knew he was out there in the first place... now if he thinks hes slick and is just gonna run up and cut my tires or something stupid like that then ill run him down and beat the bejesus out of him. i played soccer for 6 years in school... i gaurentee i could run him down in less than 50 yards even having to hurdle the edge of my kiosk to get to the front door...
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I wish sometimes I lived in Texas. You know what they use to chase people who try and mess with thier cars?... Bullets.
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you know in texas you are allowed to shoot someone if they flip you off... the law defines that gesture as an instigation of physical attack... and states that you can shoot someone over it...
it also includes anyone using "fighting words" in that catagory...
it also includes anyone using "fighting words" in that catagory...
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Yeah, we also have a law that says you can shoot someone who is at least six feet across your property line if you didn't invite them across. trespassing laws, gotta love em.
Here in Austin there's also an old local law on the books that says you can't shoot a Native American from a moving street car on Congress Avenue (main street to the state capitol).
Here in Austin there's also an old local law on the books that says you can't shoot a Native American from a moving street car on Congress Avenue (main street to the state capitol).
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hmm sprint rep 87 huh? havent seen you around... im sprint lead 86... aka M15TER P1NK... 😁 representing MD here but im Jersey Homegrown...
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He didn't ignore it, he just figured you were bluffing.
I vaselined the light pole outside my store. The skater brats were using it to make some pretty nasty turns, so I used almost a whole jar of vaseline on it. One kid ended up in the middle of the street. I don't do that anymore. But it was funny.
I vaselined the light pole outside my store. The skater brats were using it to make some pretty nasty turns, so I used almost a whole jar of vaseline on it. One kid ended up in the middle of the street. I don't do that anymore. But it was funny.
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You know what always annoys me. We've got hardwood floors in three of our stores.
Those little brat kids with those goofy shoes with skates in them... I think they're called heelys.. whatever.
I fscking hate those things. I've been trying to figure out if there is some product out there I can use to bring those things to an abrubt halt... The only idea i've come up with is spray adhesive... and it doesn't work. (my little cousin, who owns a pair of these things, donated his time to testing my theory).
Those little brat kids with those goofy shoes with skates in them... I think they're called heelys.. whatever.
I fscking hate those things. I've been trying to figure out if there is some product out there I can use to bring those things to an abrubt halt... The only idea i've come up with is spray adhesive... and it doesn't work. (my little cousin, who owns a pair of these things, donated his time to testing my theory).
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Make speed bumps. Something small enough to not notice if your walking but big enough to send somebody on wheels flat on their face.
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It might work... What i'm really looking for is not to quite make them stumble and maybe if they're uncoordinated trip over the thing... I want to just literally watch the ground come out from under them.
Not that I want them horribly maimed or anything, I'd just get faaaaaar more enjoyment out of watching one of them fall flat on thier ass... or come to a complete and abrubt dead stop
Not that I want them horribly maimed or anything, I'd just get faaaaaar more enjoyment out of watching one of them fall flat on thier ass... or come to a complete and abrubt dead stop
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I can see it now... me standing in the middle of the store with a reciprocating saw slicing holes in the floor...
I personally think cutting out a square right in front of the counter and placing a large spring underneath it would be pretty amusing.
I personally think cutting out a square right in front of the counter and placing a large spring underneath it would be pretty amusing.
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Sand works too.... My daughter has those stupid shoes, and she says if the floor is sanded, she can't skate right. (They make dance sand I don't know where to get it, but they use it for boot scootin.....)
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Sand might be workable, perhaps combined with the spray adhesive it would quickly put those damned things to a stop.
Nothing is more annoying than having to port 3 numbers to a family plan when the woman's 4 kids are gliding all over the store.
Nothing is more annoying than having to port 3 numbers to a family plan when the woman's 4 kids are gliding all over the store.
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Padded carpeting would work very well too.
Though I'm sure you wouldn't want to cover your hardwood floors.
Though I'm sure you wouldn't want to cover your hardwood floors.
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Sand is easily swept to the side, and cleaned up. Adhesive would be almost impossible to get off once the sand got in it.
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get some logoed wlecome mats and put a smal stick or length of electric cor underneath it, then watch them sail...problem beingour store would get sued .. it'd be funny as hell and teach them lesson...
my best suggestion is to put up a sign tha says:
No wheeled footwear.
No skateboards.
Company insurance prohibits use of such items on the premises. We reserve the right to remove violators from the grounds.
so when little jimmy's heely's slip out from underneath him, and mommy kowtow wants to sue just point out the sign.
my best suggestion is to put up a sign tha says:
No wheeled footwear.
No skateboards.
Company insurance prohibits use of such items on the premises. We reserve the right to remove violators from the grounds.
so when little jimmy's heely's slip out from underneath him, and mommy kowtow wants to sue just point out the sign.
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I agree, logo mats are the most logical, cost effective way to take care of this problem. Spread them all over the store so that the kids can't go more than a foot or so without one being in the way.
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yeah, but if there is a sign specifically saying no fliers, I bet you move on to the next car and just skip that one.
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kind of... only with concequences listed on it
the sign litterally says:
Notice
Place no fliers on this vehicle
offence punshable by waterbalooning
you have been warned
the sign litterally says:
Notice
Place no fliers on this vehicle
offence punshable by waterbalooning
you have been warned
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I was Christmas shopping. I parked at the mall. I came out to my car and found a big elaborate flier for orthodontic dental on my windshield (and it was pouring down rain so it was totally plastered to my window, I had to peel it off.) I was so mad I threw it on the ground.
I drove across the street to the other branch of the mall feeling horribly guilty about littering (so guilty I almost returned to the lot to pick it up.) and came out to find the stupid twits walking down the row toward my car to put ANOTHER flier on it.
I got there about as she was reaching for my windshield wiper blade and said "Please don't put that on my car."
"Oh" She says "Do you have kids?" Still lifting my wiper blade.
"No, and please do not put tha...
(continues)
I drove across the street to the other branch of the mall feeling horribly guilty about littering (so guilty I almost returned to the lot to pick it up.) and came out to find the stupid twits walking down the row toward my car to put ANOTHER flier on it.
I got there about as she was reaching for my windshield wiper blade and said "Please don't put that on my car."
"Oh" She says "Do you have kids?" Still lifting my wiper blade.
"No, and please do not put tha...
(continues)
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My wife got a flier like that stuck on her car, but it was in the middle of winter.
There was ice on the windshield and the dumbass that did it apparently didn't realize that when the wiper blade doesn't move, you shouldn't force it.
The jackass tore the wiper blade and still had the gall to put the flier underneath the torn wiper.
There was ice on the windshield and the dumbass that did it apparently didn't realize that when the wiper blade doesn't move, you shouldn't force it.
The jackass tore the wiper blade and still had the gall to put the flier underneath the torn wiper.
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so you take a picture and submit a claim for damages to the company who paid to have it on there. both the advertiser and find out who the marketing comapny is, if there is one
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i really dont think they are... its littering... because evreyone i know takes it off their windshield and tosses it on the ground.
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That story made my day man. GHAHHH 3 hours to go. Anyone have some balloons filled with acid? 👀
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now THAT would have been funny.
*smacks kid with water baloon*
Hey man, looks like you tripped... Let me help you up...
Then all you have to do is throw on the scarriest haloween mask you can find and chase him around the parking lot... That'll learn him.
3 hours to go here too... I've sold a car charger today. Thats it. and we didn't even have it in stock... so I transferred it from another store... so I'm probably not going to get the sale for that car charger... so I've literally been at work for 7 hours for no reason. This store could have been closed today and no one would have noticed or cared.
*smacks kid with water baloon*
Hey man, looks like you tripped... Let me help you up...
Then all you have to do is throw on the scarriest haloween mask you can find and chase him around the parking lot... That'll learn him.
3 hours to go here too... I've sold a car charger today. Thats it. and we didn't even have it in stock... so I transferred it from another store... so I'm probably not going to get the sale for that car charger... so I've literally been at work for 7 hours for no reason. This store could have been closed today and no one would have noticed or cared.
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wow, you'd probably make my heroes list if you didn't work for sprint...
Just kidding this is genius! It'll be fun to help his parents replace the water damaged phone they pay for when he comes in all soaked...
Just kidding this is genius! It'll be fun to help his parents replace the water damaged phone they pay for when he comes in all soaked...
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Well, I'm not so sure about shooting him unless he was on your property but you could get away with attacking him physically. I livei n texas and I constantly see fights in parking lots and no one ever get arrested.
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!!!Follow UP!!!
Kid comes back with his boss... who is subsequently his dad and it goes something like this
d - what happened here yesterday
m - (explains situation exactly how it happened same as i did here)
d - there was a sign? (speaking to kid)
jst - ... maybe i dont remember...
d - why would you put more than one on the car?
jst - i didnt
(co worker produces photographic evidence of sign in plain view in my car along with all the fliers placed on the car & video of us taking the fliers off)
d - (smacks kid across the back of the head) lets go...
🤣
Kid comes back with his boss... who is subsequently his dad and it goes something like this
d - what happened here yesterday
m - (explains situation exactly how it happened same as i did here)
d - there was a sign? (speaking to kid)
jst - ... maybe i dont remember...
d - why would you put more than one on the car?
jst - i didnt
(co worker produces photographic evidence of sign in plain view in my car along with all the fliers placed on the car & video of us taking the fliers off)
d - (smacks kid across the back of the head) lets go...
🤣
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Maybe I am just evil, but I would have used sugar water in the balloon..........
When it dried, he would have been very..... uncomfortable!
😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈
When it dried, he would have been very..... uncomfortable!
😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈 😈
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just got
PWNED!
🤣
thats the best thing i've ever heard in the war on flyers.
PWNED!
🤣
thats the best thing i've ever heard in the war on flyers.
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I hate fliers. It's like someone handing you a piece of paper and saying "Here...you throw this away".
Mitch Hedberg was a funny bastard. It's a shame he had that nasty coke habit...
Mitch Hedberg was a funny bastard. It's a shame he had that nasty coke habit...
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Was it Chris Farley on coke then? I don't remember...too many dead celebrities that I would love to have alive dead over stupid drugs...
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I went to the grocery store to buy a holder for my candle. The store was out so I bought a cake.
Waffles are just pancakes with pot holes in them.
Waffles are just pancakes with pot holes in them.
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