Shop Talk
I was wondering...
Why am I getting billed for my cell phone services? My salesman led me to believe that I could do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted to. I can get a new phone whenever like - and I never have to pay a dime.
So why do I keep getting these pesky bills?
Can someone answer this for me please?
So why do I keep getting these pesky bills?
Can someone answer this for me please?
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Because the government is out to get you. Your cell phone company has been taken over by the evil aliens who are trying to eat your brain but they want to get it nice and mushy by confusing the heck out of you first. Once you are completely irate and swearing they will spring out of their human shells and devour your cerebellum.
Hope that helps.
Hope that helps.
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It's horrible. I've witnessed this phenomenon myself. You can run, but they'll always find you. They use tracking devices that are implanted in your skull at birth. You can't kill em either. They can only be fended off for a short time by high pitched frequency's. But that is not enough to win the war against them. Our only hope, is to succumb to their will. For our survival we must become thier slaves until we can find an alternative. I fear I have already become thier slave. Do not fret for me, I shall survive. Pass this message on to those who are in hiding and let them know thier fate is at an end.
This message will self-destruct in
3.....
2.....
1.....
This message will self-destruct in
3.....
2.....
1.....
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All of us working in the industry are already slaves to their malicious designs.
But there is an underground rebellion within the slave hordes, I will contact you via a special frequency on February the 30th of next year with instructions on how to begin to break free my friend.
Have hope.
Vive Le Revolution!
But there is an underground rebellion within the slave hordes, I will contact you via a special frequency on February the 30th of next year with instructions on how to begin to break free my friend.
Have hope.
Vive Le Revolution!
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I will be waiting for your calling at your earliest convenience. I havent much strength left, but I will fight as long as I can and hold them back. Be strong my friend and bring some taco belle while your at it...
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You must be one of them!!! How did you get on this coded frequency? Damn it all. I fear we may have lost it all now that they've infiltrated our secured networks. I will work to come up with a new coded frequency that they will surely not be able to decipher. WE WILL PREVAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Now that you mention it.. I DO remember being sedated, and a large chip inserted into my brain. I think it gave me the ability to read minds. Let me try. *taps into your sub-conscience* Ohhh that's DIRTY! How can you think about stuff like that?
Maybe I could... join you in this... revolution. Certainly you would have the need of a cybertronic humanoid?
Maybe I could... join you in this... revolution. Certainly you would have the need of a cybertronic humanoid?
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We. will. be. seeing. you. soon......... don't try to run, don't try to hide, we are coming for you and you will tell all or we will make you tell all.
If. this. rebellion. continues. you. will. see. our. wrath. Just look at California, we will smoke you out if it's necessary too. 😡
If. this. rebellion. continues. you. will. see. our. wrath. Just look at California, we will smoke you out if it's necessary too. 😡
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Yep dying breath, hahahahaha we will keep you alive, don't worry your little head about that one. 🙂 We need you to be alive, for the rituals .............ha..ha..ha..ha..
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No! Never! You'll never catch me, I am a ninja! Ha ha, little did you know you had inducted a Ninja into your ranks but now you shall fall! I have a Katana and it is a well known fact that Katanas are quite lethal to alien invaders!
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Yes. you, are winning, yes yes. Let them think that, when's the last time you saw your video recording cat, I mean cat or dog?
Muah hahahahahahaha! 👀
Muah hahahahahahaha! 👀
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👀 No you are......... I am undercover as one of them, spying on you who is one of them undercover as one of us. 👀
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I THOUGHT you two were spying on me behind my back! I KNEW it. You'll never get me! *runs away* 😈 😈 😈
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its actually not a bill for your service. 😁 u truly do have one of the only FREE phone services on earth. 😲 😈 here's the catch 😈 your cell phone company is owned by the disgruntled cellphone employee's union, your billings are for your stupidity. every time u access a feature, that one of our rep decides u have no business using 🤨 YOU ARE THEN BILLED 🙂the determination process is quite simple. during the 5 minutes it took the rep to convince u that u could get "anything for free any of the time u want" he was able to do a full mental capacity screening and set your "SMARTchip" limits accordingly!
I see here on your account for account is billed to a farm road in idaho. 🙂i also see here that u own the tr...
(continues)
I see here on your account for account is billed to a farm road in idaho. 🙂i also see here that u own the tr...
(continues)
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Cuz your a dumb POS and should probably just lock yourself in a closet and die.
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Now that wasn't very nice, it's not their fault that the Alien Overlords are out to get them.
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👀 Yes. it is. They really need to conform and do their part or their end will soon stttttaaaarrrrttt...... reset system overrrrrllllllooooooaaaaaaaa.a.a.a.a.a.d.
I will find, punish, and smite whomever was part of that last raid!
I will find, punish, and smite whomever was part of that last raid!
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Mwahahaha, feel my wrath alien scum!
You will never catch me. Even now I am planning my next devastating raid!
You will never catch me. Even now I am planning my next devastating raid!
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