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This Just In!!!!!!!!!!

djdelay

Dec 1, 2005, 10:59 PM
In a surprise move that has simply taken the theological world by storm, it seems as though Pope Ratzinger and his college of cardinals have decided to ratify the canon. The word "Satan", which most theologians define as adversary or defiler is to be removed from all scripture.

His Emminency had this to say, "Due to the scrolls that have recently been unearthed and studied in Mesopotamia, the more accurate translation should be Tracfone. We feel that Tracfone conveys the sheer terror, demonic intent, and antagonism of the original scripture."

Anthropologist, Ned B Kanezzer, was quick to add, "We have yet to see how far this will extend into the Judeo-Christian and even Commercial cultures. Will the Trac...
(continues)
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uglystick

Dec 2, 2005, 11:50 AM
Surprised so me killing all those nuns was because i was possessed by "tracfone"? Twisted Evil
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longsleeves

Dec 2, 2005, 12:06 PM
Shocked
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brentgodwin

Dec 2, 2005, 6:48 PM
RAD (short for rent a dummy) Babaganoosh from the elders of the Nation of Islam has released the following statement:

"In conjunction with the Pope now changing the name of the adversary to "tracfone", we in the Nation also decided to change it in our writings and teachings."
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longsleeves

Dec 2, 2005, 7:04 PM
oh man and they're on sale right now at Family Dollar what if my neighbors by them?
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djdelay

Dec 2, 2005, 8:09 PM
then they are Satanic.....err.....I mean Tracfonic.
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longsleeves

Dec 2, 2005, 8:28 PM
man as if I didn't have enought to worry about with a Korean for a landlord who insists my avocado green stove is brand new state of the art technology
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cellularman2006

Dec 7, 2005, 6:29 PM
when u can break into his office and steal his tracfone. dispose of it quick because 9 outta 10 times he has bonded it with his soul so they never disconnect. sort of like bluetooth but alienated.

after sucessfully doing that get him a virgin mobile and that green stove of your will disappear.
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longsleeves

Dec 7, 2005, 6:33 PM
I'm going to need help I don't want to handle a tracfone unless I have some sort of mystical help a barrier of some sort to keep me safe,..what colour of stove do you think I'll get,maybe it'll match the yellow hood I have above it
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cellularman2006

Dec 7, 2005, 6:59 PM
yea! or you can get an all white one from lowes. get some teflon oven mitts from wal-mart and you should be good.

(whispering) i have to go i think tracfone is coming........i'll check back with you as soon as i can.

good luck
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longsleeves

Dec 7, 2005, 7:02 PM
thanks...busy strapping on body armour and making sure I have enough arrows in my quiver....
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cellularman2006

Dec 8, 2005, 2:06 PM
HEY I MADE IT UNSCAVED AND UNHARMED!!!

i smacked that bi*tch upside his head and vanished in the dark. but i dropped my se s710a. i think i will have to file an insurance claim
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cellularman2006

Dec 7, 2005, 6:26 PM
rite aid too. now the perscriptions are no good!!!!!!!!!!! Surprised
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